The Skanky Bunny Costume
by Hufflepufflin
Summary: After losing a bet to Blaise, Draco is forced to wear a skanky bunny costume to the annual Halloween costume party. However, Draco somehow manages to turn the night around after being rescued by the Dread Pirate Rogers himself! Just a note: THIS IS A ONESHOT. ALSO, I OWN NOTHING KTHXBAI


**A/N:** Well this monster was inspired by a challenge I saw floating around on the forums. I had a small idea and it somehow turned into this. I never meant for it to be this long. So yeah, the first two part things happened in their 5th year, while the rest would've transpired around 6 or 7 years later. Old enough to be able to legally drink. So, yeah, enjoy this or something. Sorry for any OOCness, seeing as how I wrote the majority of this around 3 in the morning. Reviews are always pleasant. Flames will be used to light the fire I shall dance by :)

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Draco eyed Pansy up and down, examining her Halloween costume. It was one of those extremely skanky bunny outfits, showing off all her cleavage and barely covering her butt.

"Are you sure you wanna wear that?" he asked skeptically. His own costume was a simple vampire one, complete with cape and fangs. "Don't you think it's a little too skimpy, even for you?"

Pansy giggled, playfully hitting Draco's arm. "Oh, you always know the right thing to say, Draco!" she squealed, adjusting her bunny ears. He just rolled his eyes. What a ridiculous getup. He wouldn't be caught dead in something as stupid as that.

Blaise came down just then, dressed as a fiendish devil. He checked out the other two's costumes, grinning with approval, especially at Pansy. "Well, are we gonna stand here all night, or are we going to party?" Draco chuckled at his friend's question, nodding, and let the two lead him out of the common room.

Draco sat at a table, drinking some punch. He was resting from all the dancing and partying. He just watched everyone else, glad to be away from it all. After a few moments, Blaise wandered over, his own punch in hand. He didn't sit, just casually leaned against the wall, one foot resting on the wall as well.

They both watched in amicable silence, commenting on someone's costume here and there. For the most part though, they just enjoyed being in each other's company. In a completely platonic way of course. Blaise didn't swing that way. As for Draco, well, let's just say it wasn't likely you'd catch him snogging a witch.

Draco passed his gaze over many classmates, friends and enemies alike, until finally settling on Neville Longbottom. Neville was wearing a Link costume, complete with fake sword and everything. Man, he looked attractive as Link. Eh, who was Draco kidding? Neville looked attractive ALL the time. Draco let out a soft sigh.

Hearing that, Blaise looked in the direction of Draco's gaze. At the sight of the green-tuniced Gryffindor, he smirked just a little. Blaise nudged Draco with his elbow. "Well, go on. What are you sitting here for? Go ask him to dance or something."

Draco turned to look at him, alarmed. "What are you talking about Zanbini?"

"Neville. I see the way you look at him all the time. It's time you did something about your little crush. So, go on before I go tell him for you."

"What?! No!" Draco exclaimed. Sighing, he leaned back in his chair. "Besides, he's straight, which means no chance for me."

Blaise chuckled, looking over at Neville. "Naw, I think he's gay."

"There's no way he's gay! I mean, just look at him! He's got no sense of style, pays absolutely no attention to his appearance, and I've never seen him checking out another guy!"

Blaise smirked again. "Well, you would know, wouldn't you? Are you willing to make a bet on it?"

Draco looked at him suspiciously. "My gaydar hasn't been wrong yet," he confirmed smugly, sticking his nose in the air.

"Alright Draco. If Neville turns out to be gay, you…," Blaise paused, looking around for inspiration. His eyes lit up and he snapped his fingers. "You have to wear the bunny costume to the next Halloween party that will be coming up at that time!"

Draco flinched a little. _The skimpy bunny outfit? That's gonna turn out just great_. "And if he isn't?" Draco asked, raising an eyebrow.

Blaise grinned down at him. "If he isn't, I'll wear the bunny outfit. What do you say?" Blaise stuck his hand out, wiggling his eyebrows mischievously.

Draco thought it over. _If I lose, I have to wear the bunny costume. I don't wanna wear that thing. But then again, if I win, Zanbini has to wear it. That would be hilarious! And, like I said, I haven't been wrong yet._ Impulsively, Draco shook Blaise's hand. "I say you've got yourself a bet Zanbini."

At that moment, Neville looked over at the pair, as if he could tell the subject of their conversation. Draco immediately took a sip of his punch, avoiding eye contact at all costs. Blaise, however, smiled brightly and waved, leaving a very confused Neville to wander back into the crowd.

Every year after that, Draco bugged Blaise about the bet. And every year, Blaise responded the same way, "Wait for it." And every year, Draco did wait because secretly, he kinda wanted to lose. Yeah, he would have to wear that costume, but it meant that he could have a chance, right?

Draco couldn't believe it. He sat in front of the TV, mouth hanging open, completely dumbstruck. Blaise stood behind the couch, one hand on the back cushion, grinning with evil glee. He twirled the remote in his free hand, before hitting the button to turn off the power. He used his hand on the couch to propel him over it, landing in the seat next to him.

On wizarding television (as wizards had their own channel that muggles could not receive), Neville had just announced to the entire wizarding community that he was indeed, homosexual. Most were not surprised, like Blaise. A few couldn't believe it, like Draco. But, of course, no one was hateful about it. After all, who could hate a gay wizard after Dumbledore?

"Well, looks like I was right after all. Who would've known? Certainly not your gaydar," Blaise teased. Draco continued to stare at the now blank TV, unable to fathom words. "Oh, and don't worry about finding a costume. I already went to the liberty of finding one in your size," Blaise went on, pulling a brand-new 'Sexy Playboy Bunny' out from behind the couch.

The costume consisted of a white strapless leotard, with fluffy white fur at the neckline, or lack thereof. At the butt of the leotard was a fluffy tail. The costume also came with bunny ears (still fluffy), a little bowtie, white cuffs with black cufflinks, and a pair of black, netted tights. Blaise also procured some white high heels from behind the couch, also happening to be Draco's size.

"You prepared for this, didn't you?" Draco asked, annoyed by the fact that Blaise was all ready for this to happen.

Blaise just grinned in answer. "It's a good thing he announced it on Halloween. So, looks like you'll already have a costume for tonight's party."

Draco groaned. He never really counted on having to wear this thing. He looked up at the clock. There were about 2 more hours until the party. Could he possibly weasel his way out of this before then? No, Blaise was to set on it. He snatched the items out of Blaise's hands. "Alright Zanbini, but if I have trouble with this thing, you better help me," he growled out, stalking to the bathroom. What? He liked to get ready extra early for parties.

In the bathroom, he stripped down to his underwear. He slipped the tights on and began pulling the leotard up, until he encountered a problem. Due to the high cut of the leotard, Draco's underwear was completely visible. Sighing, he took the garments off and poked his head back out. "Blaaaisse," he whined to the Slytherin chilling on the couch. Blaise looked back, curious. "The thing doesn't hide my underwear."

Blaise chuckled. "Looks like you're going commando then. Or you could wear a thong. Your choice," he tossed back nonchalantly.

Draco pouted and closed the door again. He sighed. There was no way in hell he would be wearing a thong the same day he wore this thing. Looks like the boxers were coming off. He slipped them off and pulled the tights back up. He then pulled the leotard on over it, where he ran into another problem: he had no cleavage to fill the top out. The bustier was sticking out a little, noticeably sad and empty. Sighing once more, he walked back into the living room.

"Blaise, I don't have the boobs for this," he grumbled, pointing at his flat chest.

Blaise looked and burst into laughter. Of course, Draco wasn't in full costume, but it still looked funny. Draco shot him a look. Blaise tried his best to stop the laughter and pulled out his cell phone. "Okay, okay, give me a second." Blaise punched in a number and held the phone up to his ear. After a few minutes of hushed conversation, the call ended. He jumped back over the couch. "Well, my friend, looks like we're gonna have to turn you into a lady."

Draco jumped back. "What!? No! It's bad enough I have to wear this! I'm not gonna look like a girl too!"

"Don't you see? It'll make this easier. At least if you look like a chick, no one's going to rag on you for dressing like one. Besides, it's the only way this will work."

Draco sighed. "Ugh, fine."

Blaise grinned. "Perfect. Pansy is on her way with some supplies. She should be here soon."

Eventually, Pansy did arrive and the two got to work on Draco. Pansy brought some implant things to give him boobs, and they managed to make it look like they were actually his. They placed a blonde wig on his head and Pansy did Draco's nails. Pansy also did Draco's make-up. It looked perfect, not overdone or underdone. When they were done, Draco looked just like a Sexy Playboy Bunny should.

Blaise and Pansy stepped back from their work, whistling appreciatively. "Damn, he looks hot. I would bang him. If he was a chick, I mean," Blaise remarked, checking his friend out. Pansy just smiled. She looked back at the clock.

"Ah! There's only 15 minutes until the party! Blaise and I haven't even changed yet!" she squeaked. She began to pick up all her things in a hurry. "Draco, you don't mind arriving alone, do you? I can drop you off on the way to my house."

Draco just grumbled that it would be fine and followed her out the door, Blaise shouting some wildly inappropriate things after them. Pansy giggled and hurried out to her car.

The car ride was mainly just Pansy reminding Draco that he needs to act like a girl unless he wants people to get suspicious. Draco sat in silence, not answering her. He was thoroughly embarrassed by this whole situation.

As they pulled up at the house for the party, Pansy handed Draco a small purse filled with essentials he would need. "And remember, for tonight, your name is Dragana," Pansy finished, driving off.

Draco groaned, walking into the party with amazing grace, even with the high heels. He ignored all the whistles and catcalls he got as he walked through the crowd, immediately heading for the bar. He ordered a drink for himself and downed it in one swallow. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he went out to the dance floor. _Might as well try to have some fun._

However, as soon as he got out there, some douche came over and slapped his butt. "Nice tail you got there. Wanna shake it for me?" the man breathed into Draco's ear, obviously drunk. He grabbed Draco's hips, pulling the cross-dressing boy toward him. Draco yelped in indignance, whipping around and hitting the man in the face with his purse. The man cursed, rubbing his jaw. "You're gonna regret that, you little bitch," the man grumbled darkly.

In a flash, he had Draco's wrist. "Listen, bitch, what I want, I get. And right now, I want you. So you can either stop fighting now, or be in for some trouble later."

Draco smirked. Like this man really had any bite to his bark. "Sorry, but I'm gonna have to take a rain check on that." With that, he began to walk away, but the man held fast.

Without any warning, Draco was shoved against the wall, hands pinned above his head. Draco didn't have the brute strength this guy did. The man slowly touched Draco's face, gently rubbing his cheek. "What a pretty face you have. Wouldn't want it to get messed up, would you? Just do what I say and you'll be fine." Draco, quick as a whip, turned his head and crunched his teeth onto the man's fingers. The man swore again, tearing his hand away, using it instead to punch Draco. The impact broke his nose, and blood began pouring. Draco moaned in pain. The man grabbed his chin, forcing Draco to look at him. "Alright, bitch, the name's Hawk. Better remember it cause you're gonna be screaming it." With that, he lunged in for a kiss. Draco tried to move away from it, but he was trapped. He let out a small whimper as the man forcefully began to kiss him. He closed his eyes, trying to find a happy place.

The next thing he knew, Hawk was pulled off of him by a masked man. Draco sunk to the ground, exhausted and in pain. His masked savior punched Hawk, knocking him to the floor. Hawk growled and got back up, aiming a swing. The masked crusader dodged it easily and kneed Hawk in the gut. Hawk doubled over and the masked hero used his elbow to ram into his head. Hawk fell to the ground unconscious.

The man rushed over to Draco and knelt down. "Miss, are you alright? Can I help you with anything?" He noticed the blood and drew in a sharp breath. "Your nose… Here let me help you up," he said, gently grabbing Draco by the arm. He helped him stand and led him over to a booth in the corner of the party. He asked a nearby waitress to bring some washcloths and water. The lady hurried off, noting the urgency in his voice.

The masked man sat down beside Draco and gently touched his face, moving it to see his nose in the light. The man grimaced and pulled away. "Just as I suspected. It's broken."

Draco let out a small whimper, still in too much shock to speak. The man pulled out his wand, pointing it at Draco's nose. "Alright, this is gonna sting a little. _Episky!_" he murmured. A soft green light drifted out of the wand and onto Draco's nose. A small crack was heard as the bone reset itself and healed the fracture. Draco winced and put a hand to his nose. It was perfectly fine, save for the blood that was still there.

The waitress came back, carrying the requested items. The masked man thanked her and took the things. She bowed in recognition and scurried off, needing to attend to other things. The man took a cloth, pouring some water on it, and began to gently wash away the blood. "Just let me know if I hurt you," he soothed quietly. Draco nodded, letting this stranger take care of him.

When he was finished, the man put the items back on the table. "Will you be alright, miss? Is there anything else I can do for you?"

Finding his voice, Draco answered, "Will you tell me your name?"

The man smiled lightly. "I'm afraid that's something I can't do for you. You see, I'm incognito. I'm trying to get away from the press for the moment. Although, you may call me after my costume. Farm Boy or Westley, whichever you would like."

Ah yes, Draco could see it now. The man was dressed like Westley from the muggle movie, _The Princess Bride_, when Westley was disguised as the Dread Pirate Rogers.

Westley began to get up, but Draco grabbed his arm. "Wait, Westley, please. Stay with me?" he asked desperately, not wanting to be left alone. Draco didn't know why, but he felt a strong attraction to this man, and he wasn't about to let that go.

Westley smiled. "As you wish." He bowed swiftly and sat back down. "Although, it's best if I knew your name as well."

Draco paused. Should he tell him? Should he let this man know that the heir to the Malfoy throne is cross-dressing for Halloween? No. If Westley won't reveal his true identity, neither will Draco. "My name's, uh, Dragana." Westley cocked his head, as if he knew that Draco was lying, but he didn't push it.

"You know, it's strange. Just this morning, I was absolutely sure of my sexual orientation. Yet, I'm starting to question it. I feel a strong attraction toward you," Westley murmured, slowly moving his hand over Draco's.

Draco, meanwhile, felt his heart begin to pound. He was having the exact same feeling. He looked into Westley's chocolate brown eyes, getting lost in them. Before he knew it, both of them had leaned in and kissed. Draco pulled away with a giddy sense of delight. "So, you're gay?" he asked happily, momentarily forgetting he was dressed as a female.

Westley cocked his head again. "Uh, yeah. At least, I thought I was. Why do you sound so happy? I might not know much about women, but I don't think a woman would be happy to hear that someone she's attracted to is gay. At least, I think you're attracted to me. I mean, you did just kiss me. Unless that was just me kissing you. I'm sorry. Was that uncalled for? Did you not want to kiss me? Maybe I-"

Before his ramblings could continue, Draco cut him off with another kiss. "You know it is possible to talk too much," he growled playfully. Westley blushed deeply, a stupid grin coming to his face.

"And to think, just this morning I announced on television I was gay," Westley sighed wistfully. Draco giggled, before the realization of what Westley had just said hit him.

"Neville?" he asked, shocked. Had he really just been saved, and then kissed by his childhood crush? Did that really just happen?

Westley pursed his lips in alarm. With a defeated sigh, and a secretive glance around, he took off the mask he was wearing. It _was_ Neville. Neville ran a hand through his hair, sighing. "Looks like I've been caught. I guess that last comment wasn't the greatest thing to say."

At this, Draco just burst out laughing. He couldn't believe his luck. It was all because of this ridiculous bunny costume! Without it, he probably never would've caught Neville's eye, much less kissed him. _Twice._ "Well, I've got a secret too," Draco answered, slowly pulling off the blonde wig.

Neville watched with a mix of curiosity and surprise. After contemplating the now revealed man in front of him, his eyes widened in recognition. "Draco?" he asked in a hushed whisper. Draco smiled and nodded in answer.

Neville fell back against the booth's back cushion, running a hand through his hair. "I just kissed Draco Malfoy," he muttered to himself. With a new sense of pride in his voice, Neville began sitting back up, repeating, "I just _kissed_ Draco Malfoy." A grin came to his face at the revelation. "Looks like I really am gay," he said, still grinning.

"I dunno. You were initially attracted to me as a female, leading to some heterosexual tendencies," Draco replied teasingly.

"Not true," Neville answered. "I've been attracted to you for a while now. I obviously saw you through your feminine disguise and was attracted by that."

Draco shook his head, laughing. "Yeah, yeah. Just kiss me again." Draco scooted closer to Neville, running a few fingers up his chest.

"As you wish," Neville happily complied, leaning in to kiss him.

When they pulled away, Neville timidly put an arm around him and placed his hand on Draco's hip. "So, can I ask a question?" Draco gave a tiny nod, contentedly resting his head on Neville's chest. "Why are you dressed as a girl in a provocative bunny costume?"

Draco chuckled. "I lost a bet. Actually, it's kinda your fault I lost the bet."

"How so?"

"By being gay."

This hurt Neville a little. "So, you didn't want me to be gay?" he asked, worry and hurt in his voice.

Draco immeadiatly shot up. "No, that's not what I meant! It's just… A few years ago, I didn't think you were. So Blaise and I bet on it. And, obviously, I lost. But I love the fact that you're gay. If you weren't, I couldn't do this." Draco kissed him again.

Neville smiled. "Well, how about I buy you dinner to recompensate you for your troubles?"

Draco smiled as well. "Longbottom, are you asking me out on a date?"

"Well, if you wanna see it like that, yeah. Unless you don't wanna go on a date with me. That's perfectly understandable to me. Either way, I do wanna get you dinner. Unless that just seems too much like a date. Well, then I'm sure we can work something-" His rambling was once again cut off by a kiss.

"C'mon let's go," Draco said, standing up and pulling Neville up as well. "But first, let's fix our disguises. You know, so the press can't find us." Draco gently placed Neville's mask back on him, making sure it was snug. He then threw the wig back on and readjusted the bunny ears. He grabbed Neville's hand and began to lead him out.

"Oh, I see, you little bitch! You'll walk off with him but not with me! Oh, you're really gonna get it now!" A voice called behind them. They turned to see Hawk, fuming.

Neville clenched his fists, ready to knock this idiot out again. Draco smirked and whispered, "Don't worry. I'll take care of this." He walked over to Hawk, smiling seductively and whispered something into his ear. Hawk turned beet red and pushed Draco away, but not enough. "No! I ain't like that!" he shouted, escaping back into the crowd.

Draco walked back to Neville, taking his hand again, laughing. "What did you say to him?" Neville asked quizzically.

"Oh, not much. I just mentioned that I was a guy. Turns out Hawk isn't gay. Who would've known?" Draco shrugged, pulling Neville outside, Neville laughing.

Neville lead him to his car and took them to some fancy restaurant or another. They reminisced about the old days, and discussed Neville's recent rise to fame due to his Herbology practices. Draco ordered them a bottle of wine, but ended up drinking it by himself. Neville had politely refused, since he was the designated driver. By the time the meal was over, Neville had payed for it and was carrying an excessively drunk Draco to his car.

Around 6 o'clock in the morning, Draco woke up in an unfamiliar bed, slightly hung-over. Holding his head, he crawled out from under the covers and hung his feet over the edge, his toes barely touching the cold floor. He was no longer wearing the bunny costume. Instead, he was in an extremely large T-shirt, as it almost went to his knees. The wig was gone and the makeup had been washed off.

Confused, Draco got up from the otherwise empty bed and opened the door of the room. He walked into an equally unfamiliar living room. His bunny costume, including the wig and fake boobs sat in a corner of the room. A noise came from the couch. Apprehensive, Draco approached the couch, ready to flee in case of danger.

His eyes rested upon Neville, still asleep. The large Gryffindor mumbled something and turned on the couch, naturally facing toward Draco. _This must be his apartment_. Draco smiled fondly and sat on the edge of the couch. He reached over and gently brushed some hair away from Neville's face.

The slight touch caused him to stir. Neville's eyes fluttered open, and, upon seeing the small blonde above him, he smiled. "Looks like you're up," he murmured hazily, still half-asleep.

"No duh, Sherlock," Draco answered good-naturedly. He got a pang in his forehead and put a hand to it. "What happened last night? I don't remember much."

Neville's smile instantly fell. _Does he not remember us…kissing?_ He thought worriedly. Upon seeing the instant change of expression, Draco hurriedly back-tracked. "Well, I remember plenty. I remember being at the restaurant and ordering the wine. After that, it all goes a little fuzzy. Care to help me out?"

Neville breathed a sigh of relief. "Of course. Let's see," he began, sitting up. "I got your drunken ass into my car to take you home. Except you were too drunk to tell me where you live. So I brought you here. You instantly started stripping out of your costume, saying you couldn't take it anymore. I pushed you into the bathroom for privacy and gave you one of T-shirts and a pair of clean underwear. You hadn't come out for about 10 minutes, so I started to worry and checked up on you. I found you passed out on the floor, wearing only the underwear. So I put the shirt on you and cleaned your face off. I carried you over to my bed and tucked you in, gathered up your things, and then made my little bed here on the couch."

Draco couldn't help but giggle a little at his actions. This is why he shouldn't drink. "But why did you sleep on the couch? There was enough room for both of us in the bed," Draco asked curiously.

Neville rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Well, I couldn't take advantage of you like that. I mean, we barely had our first date last night. I figured it'd be best if I just camped out here."

Draco chuckled and gave Neville a quick peck on the cheek. "That some sort of foolish Gryffindor chivalry? Besides, what if I got frightened in the middle of the night? What if I needed someone to hold me?" Draco pouted playfully.

Neville just blushed and mumbled something incoherently. "Uh, I guess I didn't think of that. Sorry Draco." At that, he yawned, obviously still tired.

Draco smiled, yawning also. "You can make up for it now," he purred, grabbing Neville's hand and pulling him off the couch. He led him back to the bedroom and climbed into the bed. He patted the space next to him, inviting Neville to join him. Neville gulped and went to lie next to him.

Draco immediately curled into Neville's strong chest. "Now this is much more cozy," he murmured, beginning to drift into sleep. Neville smiled and kissed Draco's forehead, before falling asleep himself.

That's how they spent most of the day. Wrapped in each other's arms in Neville's bed, fast asleep. They would eventually spend much more time in that bed together, but that comes later. Let's just let them enjoy this innocent romance for now.


End file.
